Pizza Huts 6 cheese pizza set meal -$25.60

i slept clenching my teeth.

the day b4 i bumped into my frnd whom i had lost, or more like never had, contact wif for 2.5yrs. we had met in on tour to China, Harbin - a popsicle country close to Russia. im still feeling happy abt the incident, after all the odds of seeing her again weren't good. haha i feel blessed, very.



then i had pizza wif my frnd from primary/secondary sch, well not that we ever talked in sch. it seems she's had a worse version of church encounters as compared to mine.



(heregoes the stepping.)



ive got so many kinds of friends from church. all of them, i suppose, hav the same root problem. the pple in the church.

i feel. pple look to the leaders of the church for council, advice, hope and love. i do too. unfortunate, since these pple dont come close to wat Jesus is.

leadership is abt serving, not abt serving God, it abt serving pple. many leaders have never solved their need for love and attention.

they make the worst leaders.



i used to think, while being influenced by american cartoons, that the leader is the strongest in the group. that is the first misconception most hav as a kid.

secondly, "power" in leadership is rightly used to help pple under that leadership and not a tool to govent or rule over them. however wif pple who need attention the "power" which they recieve they use it to put pple down thinking that that makes them a step above the rest. firstly putting pple down makes one lower (i have been guilty of that).

thirdly leadership is over glorified. i think a good leader goes through the pain and problems of those under him, plus his own. thus when the group succeeds as a team much credit is given to the leader, since he represents the team and also since he was the main factor that held the group together.

now, the pple who need attention see the attention the leader get and hunger for it. they then use ways and means to achieve leadership and thus u get lousy leaders, who care only to draw attention to themselves and away frm the other members of the group, and in the case of the church even away frm God. these lousy leaders like to feel worshiped, and thus defeats the purpose of the position.



having said that, the pple who are affect by these braggarts either seek to justify those horrible actions and become as lousy leaders themselves or, they havent gotta clue wats going on arnd them or, they noe abt it but jus try to live out their lives in church on a low profile and not stepping on anyones toes or, those who look for a different church or, finally those who give up on Jesus.



i wish i cld change the world.



be reminded that the one who wrote the above is human and prone to being baised who also needs attention. and dont noe wat uve been through or the challenges u face, but dun give up on Jesus because of experiences wif pple, cos they are not worth it.



well ive still got my mask on